Facebook: Not for the Thin-Skinned

It's funny how your feelings can be semi-hurt by a casual acquaintance on Facebook. Someone who you rarely talk to. Someone who doesn't really know you or what makes you tick. Someone you might never see again, and yet, a simple act they do to you on Facebook leaves you with an ill feeling in your stomach for a moment.

Several months ago I had a crazy random, semi-defining moment in my life and it was shared with a guy who I once crushed on 10+ years ago. In fact I did blog about this moment with him, but decided to remove the post since I didn't feel like it honored him and some of the details were left out of the story (some of you might have read it). To quickly rehash it: I show up to his house after not seeing each other for at least 8 or 9 years. His parents and my parents went to church together and Brian (the guy) knew I was a Christian. He answers the door high as a kite on pot and very disoriented: pants falling off, running around, confused, etc. It was a scary moment in my life and I wanted to leave. He pleaded for me to stay and immediately started talking to me about God, his relationship with Christ, and other subjects revolving around faith, life, and being a better person.

I left the night with the most amazing feeling knowing that was exactly where the Lord wanted me that evening. A follow up email from Brian confirmed he felt the same way and was thankful I stayed even though it must have felt like I was "walking into the lion's den", as he put it, and was glad to connect with a woman on an intellectual level for a change. A few more follow up emails were swapped back and forth as he confessed he was really chewing over a lot of things I had said.

Today I was looking at my Facebook inbox and see that I can no longer access Brian's profile. I can't see his picture and I can't reply back to the last email. Nothing. Not only was I "un-friended", but I was blocked 100% access to this guy. Whoa! Effort was deliberately made to keep me from contacting him ever again.

I was a little miffed. Slightly puzzled. Feelings semi-hurt.

I made an effort today not to take it personally because this probably doesn't have much to do with me. He's obviously going through some stuff and doesn't feel the need to keep up a casual friendship with me. I was part of that defining moment that night and maybe he doesn't want a reminder or any accountability to remember what was talked about that night. Who knows.

I know God wanted me at his house that night. I know I was used in a small way. And yet I desired to still be used, even as a friendly contact. I don't let go of people very easily, especially people who I feel like I can "help" or just love on. And yet I received a very large message from God today: Your job here is done.

And that settles that.